Dear Millennials, You Were Made Dumb On Purpose
So. It’s 2018 and with every ounce of expected social presumption you can muster and with blatant disregard for the reality of all time, which is that neither your historical ignorance, nor your dumpster fire of an education find you even remotely qualified for national leadership, you’re sallying forth to end Trump, run for office, give everyone a free job and a free college education and a lifetime supply of condoms and herpes creme for the afterparty. God help us.
And glorious flower of the societal pipe-bomb that you represent, you LOVE, hashtag-heart emoji-heart emoji, SOCIALISM.
Because you’re that dumb.
So, before you mount the national stage and embarrass yourself openly for your lack of mastery of basic terminology, or your ignorance of basic world geography, or for believing that having more than one job affects the unemployment rate, a few thoughts. Comrade.
Newsflash: It’s my money. I earned it. The government isn’t entitled to it. I am not a selfish person for refusing to be stolen from by the least efficient attempt at wealth redistribution ever devised. Taxation is theft. Lowering taxes is the righting of wrong. Socialism is charity at gunpoint. Better known as armed robbery. It will be dealt with accordingly. Capiche?
I am generous to a fault. I just don’t invest naive confidence in proven thieves and liars as altruistic arbiters of human compassion.
How’d ObamaCare work out for you? Takes real compassion to steal someone’s tax refund and shove it down the rat hole of a non-compliance penalty for a system that from a practical sense offers zero health coverage…while promising FREE health insurance. Cruelty, writ large. Scam. Hoax. Tried to tell you.
How about that $200,000 college diploma on your wall and that college loan you’re about to default on? Or, the fact that standardized tests were literally hacksawed into giving your generation what amounts to the most expensive academic version of a soccer participation trophy in history. Nice.
There’s a sadistic malevolence in that sort of cynical promise that I’ve only read about in books. One book in particular. The protagonist smelled of sulfur. Like many of his servants and imps.
It is guarantee that I have donated more to charity than you have made in the course of your adult life. Don’t lecture about compassion until you’ve lived it.
I will tolerate no tolerance lectures from the least tolerant lot of sadistic harpies who believe killing babies is freedom and that Muslims who toss homosexuals off of rooftops, dissect women’s genitals, rape men, women and children with religious sanction and behead Christians are more enlightened and deserve more respect than Trump voters. Seething, now.
I don’t care if you’re gay. I don’t care if you’re bi. I don’t care if you’re a purple unicorn with a monkey tail and a rainbow mane. I don’t care if you prefer Crisco-slathered Twister games with whole sororities full of participants or naked midnight runs on frigid October nights. I do care that you are dangerously dumb and mentally unstable. On purpose. Because I know why it was done to you. And who did it.
You were educationally stunted on purpose and with cruel, malicious effectiveness. You know less about less than any American generation before you. You realize this, yes? Oops. Of course you don’t. No Child Left Behind. No child allowed to think critically.
You’ve been programmed to be a little automaton that believes ‘racism,’ and ‘intolerance,’ exist in anyone and everyone who doesn’t cow to socialism or social engineering of reducing humanity to a carbon footprint.
You believe Fidel Castro was a hero and Thomas Jefferson was a slave owner. In my dictionary, that’s an idiot illiterate. Toddlers in the age of smartphones and stupid people. All kinds of angry, but not a neuron to be found.
You are Brownshirt. You are Red Gang. You are Changsha Brigade. You are Khmer Rouge. You are Young Pioneer. You are Eloi. And that sentence alone will cost you no less than six Google searches to decipher. I rest my case.
You were born on May 4th and in October 1917.
And on November 9th, 2016.
A useful idiot. A copper top. A windup toy. A disposable knife. Devoid of true empathy. Devoid of conscience. Perfectly suited for an attempted cultural rewrite and a culling of those you see as antiquarian, bitter clingers to both bible and gun. Mirrors and medicine are harsh, more often than not. But you should always know that the resistance you find is an attempt to save you.
You and your sadly defenseless generation that believes in things like utopia, safe zones, triggering and hate speech. Precious little snowflakes in the blast furnace of real life. So, make it personal all you want. Make it ever so personal. It’s not. The world is business of cause and effect.
Your ideas and ideals are losing and have lost everywhere they’ve been installed, to the tune of 340-million deaths in the 20th century alone. Even more than you and your kind have aborted. Shocking.
Occupy life. Occupy a library. Occupy a history book not written by a Communist sympathizer. Occupy something, anything other than your smartphone and your smug, misguided, misanthropic, myopic idiocy that mistakenly places you at the center of the smallest universe ever sold for political fun and corporate profit.
Stop being a stooge. Start today. You might still have time to have a life.
But it’ll require admitting and realizing that right now, you’re stupid beyond words. And too arrogant and cool to realize it.
Most of the world’s fortunes depends on you being willing to realize that and rectify it in ways that don’t require a safe space for anyone else while you work out your issues and your policy stupidity.
Socialism sucks. You’d know that if you hadn’t had the amazing fortune not to be born just about anywhere else but the United States. The place people have been fleeing to for years to escape the very thing your stupid teacher at your stupid school has convinced you is “neat.”
Oh. And the whole ear-gauge thing? Knock it off.
Go with God.