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EDITORIAL: Shad OlsonPOLITICS
Home›POLITICS›EDITORIAL: Shad Olson›Michelle ‘Big Mike’ Obama’s Open Threat to America: “Elect Joe Biden, or else!”

Michelle ‘Big Mike’ Obama’s Open Threat to America: “Elect Joe Biden, or else!”

By Shad Olson
September 27, 2020
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Listen carefully enough for long enough and more often than not, people will tell you exactly who they really are and what they want. It’s a hill country truism held precious by folk who preferred wide open spaces and non-metaphorical manure long before the miserable intrusion of things like social distancing and political bullshit sold by the ton. And still do.

When it comes to silk purses made of sow’s ears and chicken salad made with foul instead of fowl, there’s no more gifted salesman than Michelle Obama. Or, Michael, to those who know her best.

On Monday night via Orwellian telescreen, the former first “lady” slapped together a shit sandwich for the ages and sold it with a pleading plasticine performance straight out of Vaudeville. Putting considerable fiction skills to work in defense of an indefensibly incompetent Presidential ticket, Michelle reminisced unabashedly about things that never happened and versions of multiple people that don’t exist. Recasting the malaise of the Great Recession as the economic glory days of husband Barack Obama, painting lumbering dunderhead Joe Biden as a man of inestimable intellect and poise, and perhaps most laughably, promising that if America chooses empty-headed Howdy Doody Joe and VP-Dominatrix Kamala Harris in November, the slow salad days of the most sluggish economic recovery will be here again.
But that’s not all she said. Not by a long shot.

Monday night, Michelle Obama’s verklempt meandering message to the nation included tacit confession to what wide awake patriots have known from the outset: Nothing since 2016 has been by chance. More than that, it rang as dire promissory that the cataclysm that has been the accelerated misery of 2020 is only a preview of coming attractions if the nation chooses Donald Trump again.

Said the linebacker-shouldered Moose-chelle, “If you think that things can’t possibly get any worse, trust me, they can and they will.”

What Michelle Obama accidentally delivered was nothing less than a bulging Deep State threat of continued destabilization, destruction and socioeconomic disaster…UNLESS America votes to elect Joe Biden.

Translated by intelligence, it was tantamount admission that the preceding four years have been nothing less than an orchestrated procession of mass misery infliction events and choreographed chaos as a behavior modification technique. Deliberate and malevolent comeuppance for a society guilty of electing Donald Trump to high office. And a stern rebuke against anyone who chose Trump in 2016 but still anguishing under the misbegotten impression that the present uncloaked version of Marxist demoniac-Democrats want anything for themselves other than money and unmitigated power. At any price.

What may have been meant as equal parts phony compassion and breathy indictment of Trump’s purported policy shortcomings and incompetence instead resonated instantly as perhaps the only honest moment by a Demo-Communist over the past decade. What Michelle Obama accidentally delivered was nothing less than a bulging Deep State threat of continued destabilization, destruction and socioeconomic disaster in a psychopathic condescending tone worthy of Joan Cusack at her batshit-evil best in the movie Arlington Road.

And you don’t have to know the ending to that movie to know that where America’s inextricably incestuous intelligence leviathan is concerned, the biggest explosions are yet to come.

Shape your behavior accordingly.

Or, as Michelle promised, you and all of America and the world will pay the price.

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